gina's deck & lab

~ I stopped wondering more than 10 years ago. Now I wander …

gina's deck & lab

Monthly Archives: Mar 2013

Cuts, bruises and such

25 Mon Mar 2013

Posted by Gina WNDR in from the deck

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Lately, I have been going through circumstances that made me realize some things. Yes, something serious but enlightening, at least to me…

I realized that in life, we will go through hurts that cut us so deep that the brain simply choose to forget them. The emotions are completely shut on the matter. As if it never happened. As if we have never felt that hurt before. We go on living like that. Until an event or series of events occur and open that box so tightly closed and sealed. When this happens, when the box is opened, each person chooses to react differently. Some may choose to reflect on the matter. Some may still choose to ignore and put them back in the box and seal it even tighter. Some may choose to keep the box in storage and some may choose to throw it out into the open sea fearing that the box will accidentally be re-opened!

By choosing to reflect on the matter, a person may be able to resolve some if not all, those unresolved feelings and problems that he/she had been unable to figure out. Some may turn into a (much) bitter person. This I believe, will depend so much so on the character of a person.

I will give an example of my recent enlightenment of a part of who I am. People seem to have trust issue. I do not. Simply because, trust, to me, is not something that I have or give to begin with. I do however, believe. What I believe is that one way or another, everyone around me lie, cheat and do things with the thoughts of having advantage of doing it, not just for sake of doing or wanting to do things. If they have not, one day they will. The good thing about this is that if they do not act as expected, they are considered to be out of the norm and they get bonus points. I would consider that good things happened. If they behave as what I believe, they act as expected, I will not be caught by surprise or be hurt by it. I sincerely apologise if anyone reading this post is offended by what I just wrote, but that is my truth to you. Those close to me know this truth and they have been getting the bonus points hahaha

Anyway, what I have been trying to say is that I realized that I too had experienced cut so deep that I forgot all about it. How my truth in trust came about… No, I will not tell all here on the experience. Enough to say that the experience and the hurt, change people. For better or for worse. It is a form of self defense, the mechanics understood only by the brain and the heart. Oh, in any event, my references to hurt is not just the kind of hurt that one would cry his/her eyes out. Hurt, as I have experienced, does not always entail tears.

Goodness! With this post I just realized this Monday has suddenly turn into a “heavy” Monday. Nevertheless, it is still a good day, with Kimora Lee being in town and such hahaha Yes, I would really love to see the fabulous lady…

With this, I end this post here.

XOXO and have a blessed Monday.

안녕하세요!

23 Sat Mar 2013

Posted by Gina WNDR in from the deck

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네. 한국어. This blog has unintentionally been on a hiatus due to my work load. There are friends I last met many moons ago! I sincerely apologize. Although there is a saying that you will make time for those who matter. In my case, what time left were spent either on myself or my family. I do believe in putting one’s self first and then the rest follow.

Anyway, what am trying to say here is that I will try to spend more time here and meeting up friends, old or new. I will tell you guys about all the good (or bad) food I have been having hahaha.

그럼, until next time, take care 😉

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