Trust, there can only be one thing when it comes to trust. No matter how we put the word “trust” in a sentence, the effect is just the same. When we say, “I trust that you are well” or “I trust that you will get it sorted out”, the effect is still the same isn’t it? We are saying that we believe. If we say “I trust you”, that definitely means we are putting our believe and trust in that person.

When it comes to trust, most of those who know me knows that I have issues. To me, it’s not really an issue as I trust myself. It is others who have issues with my level of trust if that bothers them. Am sorry, I really am, if that is too harsh. I believe, at least with me that is, trust, similar to respect, is gained. No one should just give trust without proof that it will not be misused, abused or wasted.

Trust, to me, is something we decide whether to give or keep. It can run very low or just kept reserved. Mine is mostly kept reserved as it is low in the first place. It is mine to keep or give. When I decide and do give, it’s no longer mine. I do not take back the trust I gave. What happens next is either it is safely kept by and with the person I gave it to or it’s just gone, dies of, kapish! When the later happens, chances of trust being given to that same person is, I dare say, is nil, nada.

There are times I wonder, why can’t everyone think carefully before doing stupid things or things that hurt others. All we need to do is put ourselves, imagine ourselves in the other person’s shoes. How would it feel? How would you feel when that little trust that you have and gave is taken for granted? It’s not difficult isn’t it then. Just ask yourself this kind of question and you know what you should and shouldn’t do. Trust me, it’s not that difficult. There you go, am asking you to trust me. Knowing how it feels to be betrayed, would you and I lie and betray the trust given to us? You go ahead and ask yourself that question. I suppose it’s tougher for those who has no problem trusting others and those who have never been betrayed. On the other hand, good for them to have never been betrayed. My brother did say this though, “Well, s**t happen!”.

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I don’t know but there’s this thing about football. I read an article once that said something along this line, that football is the only game were everyone can actually get together and not care about citizenship, status, race and religion. I somewhat agree. Nobody cares about any of that when it comes to football. Look at the World Cup line ups. Even a communist country can proceed to try out and actually go ahead and compete! Nobody cares that North Korea is a communist country (honestly am not so sure what is it that is so bad about being a communist if everyone is happy). Nobody cares about the history of the Serbs and the Germans! (In fact I support Germany in each World Cup events). Doesn’t even matter if you are dirt poor like most African countries.

The thing is, if you recall, I did say I somewhat agree with the earlier statement, which means I do not agree completely. Reason being, outside of the stadium where the actual match is being played or was held, we can still see (in the news) that there are fanatics causing riots and injuring others. Although this kind of incidents are not as common during other football seasons e.g. EPL, there are still fanatics. Some fans care which club or country the others are rooting for and when the club or country they support loses to the one others support, all hell break loose! Here comes the hooligans!

I am (although not a hardcore) nevertheless a fan of this sport (am actually a fan of many sports including golf (although some think that golf is not actually a sports)). As I have mentioned earlier, when it comes to the World Cup, it is Germany that has my heart and support. When it comes to the English Premier League, it’s Arsenal. I don’t care what others may have to say about Arsenal but I also do not go around “praising” Arsenal, provoking supporters of other clubs. I usually (I actually prefer to) watch football alone. That way I can express my frustrations my way without offending or provoking others. Also, it may not be very lady like of me when I watch football. I think everyone gets the idea ;D

There is this thing about football that other sports may not share, the way the fans cheer, the way cable television subscriptions increase, the way the fans accommodate the time of the matches with their sleeping hours, the way the fans love the game and the way the fans love their clubs/countries. What other sports activities get the whole world together, sometimes or most of the times, at the same time?!

I would normally read the newspaper after working hours, unless of course I get lucky in the morning or during the day. So, as usual, after work yesterday, on my way out, I stopped by the reception counter at my office (soon to be EX) and got myself a copy of the newspaper. Folded it into two, put in at the back seat of my car, drove home, took a shower, sat down and started flipping through the pages of the newspaper. At page three, I saw a news article I considered of interest to me. An article on the Malacca Government’s decision to proceed with the construction of three animal testing laboratories.

This particular piece is of interest to me as I love animals, most of them, and I do care. Yes, it worries me that the Malacca Government decided to go ahead with the project notwithstanding the objections and protests by many. Reading through the news article, apparently the WHO gave its go-ahead for the proposed project. Well, WHO is concerned with anything health related, not animal testing, correct? The one concerned with anything animal would be PETA, correct? Thus, by saying the WHO approved the proposed project, was he also implying that the WHO approved animal testing? I don’t know, you tell me…

What bothered me the most was actually the replies and statements made by the Malacca Chief Minister, for example, (1) “Why do they (NGOs) protest everyday? Don’t they have other work to do?”; (2) “They say they do not test on animals, but many medications were tested on animals. So when they are sick, do not take these medicine, eat only vegetables.” (I quoted what was allegedly his statements in that particular newspaper and am not trying to put it out of context)

First of all, correct me if am wrong but NGOs are mostly consist of activists and/or lobbyists, those who lobby and protest. Second of all, he should instead inform the public (or at least be politically correct) of the reasons or grounds this proposed project and animal testing methods (which as we are all aware of had been protested against for many years!) is good and should not be objected against. Address the issue for goodness sake! Do not re-direct people’s attention to other things like the job scope of NGOs!

I got worried thinking these are the kinds of statements that came from our politicians. It is to me, rather embarrassing! Statement not substantiated by substance. It seemed like child-like verbal fights. I don’t know, perhaps it’s just me…

p.s. – Do not mistake my sentiments as sentiments against any political party and/or personnel. Am not interested in politics generally.

Well, I woke up this morning, no, not feeling like P. Diddy. I woke up this morning with some arguments going on in my little brain (actually my brain is of normal size, proportionate to my size), mainly due to my mini discussion with my old friend Rose (no she’s not old, it’s the friendship that’s old). The thought that came to my mind this morning was this idea of high income earning individuals in Malaysia.

High income earning individuals, is there or should there be a specific definition for this similar to that of “high net worth” individuals under the law? Most definitely, in my personal point of view, NO.

Recently, the Mayor of Kuala Lumpur made a few statements, his views as to this matter or idea of high income earning (individuals). First of, he was of the view that one can survive if one earns RM3k a month. You ask, “Is he talking about RM3k net, after deducting all expenses and necessary payment (e.g. PCB, EPF, utilities bills and similar)?” Correct me if am wrong here but I think he wasn’t. Then he went on to say, it (I suppose “it” here refers to whatever is left of your monthly salary) should be enough if we were to cut down our expenses for example car and ASTRO!

Well, Mr. Mayor, my apologies if I got you wrong but I personally, do not want to just survive living in Kuala Lumpur! I personally (as most people are I believe) work really hard for my money and I don’t just want to survive. I want to be able to enjoy what I worked hard for. If the Mayor or anyone else for that matter is suggesting that we shall live on the necessary only, internet access will be a luxury similar to ASTRO being a luxury therefore the Government and/or those relevant should perhaps re-consider promoting this luxurious items. Perhaps travel agencies should consider leaving this beautiful country as there would perhaps be no one purchasing any trips/holidays in bound or out bound (particularly out bound although it would make no difference if going on holidays are considered a luxury).

If this is how we ascertain the numbers of high income earning individuals, I would rather fall in the low income earning individuals group. I have expenses you know. I own a car, rent a condominium, eat at restaurants, go for holidays. My God, look at this lifestyle of a low income earning individual! Fun I think.

So, which category do you want to fall under if that is how the Malaysian Government defines high income earning individuals? Do you want to be in the high income earning individuals group or the low income earning individuals group?

Perhaps when deciding, you would want to consider these –

(i) How many pair of shoes do you need?;

(ii) How many pair of pants do you need?;

(iii) How many glasses of coffee do you need (to drink)?;

(iv) Oh, do you really need any increment in your salary too?

Oh well, I think you get where am going.

p.s. I have no intention of provoking any anti-government ideology nor am I interested in politics. This is purely my concern in relation to the new idea of high income earning individuals currently being discussed.

Who doesn’t know Kelly Clarkson…the first and most successful American Idol. Yes, Carrie Underwood is successfully trailing.

I was so excited, first, to hear that KL was in her list of venue for the Kelly Clarkson All I Ever Wanted World Tour. Then, I was excited that Maxis customers get discounts for the tickets. I got even more excited the night I was there, at the concert. Irregardless of the fact that I was having really bad sore throat, flu and mild fever, I was there, singing along to almost all the songs. Well, almost all her songs as I needed to take a few breaks to drink some water LOL. Am still rather excited about the whole thing. Perhaps because it was one heck of a concert. That lady can sing. She rocks! No costume-changing was necessary, not even proper shoes…well, she didn’t even had slippers on for goodness sake! It was simply Kelly Clarkson, her performances and her band. Oh yes, we, her fans were there too. It was worth every single cent! Granted, nothing is ever perfect. There were times when the music was rather too loud her voice drowned in it. Nevertheless, her fans were singing along to her and her drowning voice were somehow still heard by her fans.

The other thing, perhaps the one thing that I was very disappointed about was that the sponsors were rather really strict with their photo-taking policy. I remember very clearly that the announcement made said no video and flash photography allowed. I know why video taking is not allowed. I also know why flash photography is not allowed. So, when people started taking photos (without having the flash on) the security insisted that it was prohibited. There were a number of people (including a mother and her two daughters) who were “removed” from their seats (I suppose brought to the security base or something) and return to their seats only after one or two songs and never again did they take any photo. I found that very annoying. Thank god it didn’t happen to me as I stopped taking photos seconds before the security got into their position/spots. Honestly, if it happens to me, I will surely tell them to have another look at their own announcement and insist to continue taking photos.

Whatever off-putting things there were (the fact that I was having really bad sore throat, flue etc and very strict organisers) if there is another Kelly Clarkson concert, if I am still alive, I will definitely go.

Oh ya, it was her birthday a day before the concert.

Kelly Clarkson – Birthday in Kuala Lumpur

I sometimes wonder, why do some people have so much hope that the kind of  happiness that often happen in movies would happen to them…I suppose they have heard that it happened to someone who is a friend of a friend of a friend or a friend…in some part of the world.

I remember saying “Things that happen in the movies happen only in the movies. If they happen in the real world, they happen to others, not you, not me, and I suppose these are the lucky people.” That is of course my personal “observation”.

Does that make me a pessimist? Or perhaps a realist?

No, am definitely not a pessimist. My hope is only to have understanding…to be nice…to be kind…I can be happy…I can make myself and keep myself content so long as I feel happy or content in my heart and that no one makes me angry or annoy me.

So, my hope is simple and if I feel like “seeing” the kind of happiness that happens only in the movies, I will watch the movies.

Zee Avi, a small person in size but is huge with her fans. She is one talented lady. I was lucky to get to attend her live performance at Life Centre, Kuala Lumpur. It was amazing. She was a natural. Her fans know the lyrics to all her songs! That’s how huge she is with her fans. Her album went GOLD here in Malaysia. (She gave it to her father on stage as a birthday gift)

Not only that she has a great voice, but she is a good entertainer too. I, for one, was entertained. She was so cute with her “Jap, jap jap” (in English “Hold on, hold on, hold on”) and “Apadia?” (in English “Say what?”). She was fun to watch and lovely to listen. Her voice reminded me of that of Norah Jone’s (only Zee Avi sounds sexier with her deeper voice). She sounded very mature (for such a small person, well at least to the Westerners. She is Asian size I think).

However, there are quite a number of people who do not know who Zee Avi is. For more info on Zee Avi, visit the websites below –

(1) Zee Avi (Official Page).

(2) Zee Avi (Wikipedia)

Seriously, what about the telly? Friends who came over to my “palace” (as how my friend Rose put it) will go, “Hey, you don’t have a telly?! Oh my god!” and my response will be, “Yes, I don’t have a telly. I don’t NEED one.”. Then they will go, “What?! Everyone need to have a telly. How do you survive babe?”. They seemed genuinely surprised and curious.

My brother said to my youngest sister something along this line, “Telly is “mainstream”. You are too mainstream.”. Am not too sure about the telly being too mainstream but the reason for me not having a telly is simply because I do not watch that much television. I have things to do like cleaning, sweeping, wiping, laundry, fiddling with all my toys & gadgets (yes, girls have toys & gadgets too, not just boys and I love my BlackBerry and Sony Alpha DSLR camera the most!). When I do sit down after all the cleaning, sweeping, wiping and laundry, and should I decide not to fiddle with my toys & gadgets or play the Sony PSP, I will be in front of my beloved laptop. Yes, I love my laptop too. I love gadgets but I do not consider the telly as a gadget nor it is a toy. I use my laptop to watch all the series that I like (on-line streaming or via dvds). I watch movies on my laptop too! Most people (if not everyone) would prefer to watch series and movies on the telly due too reasons such as bigger screen, better sound system (if you have one of course) and it is far more comfortable sitting on the sofa. All are valid and good reasons but I have a problem. I have a minor disorder. I can not concentrate. I can not give my full attention when something is played on the telly. I have ADD! LOL. No, seriously, I can not seem to focus on what is playing on the telly. However, when the same thing is being played on my laptop screen, which is like in my face, it will get my full attention (unless of course it is something I do not want to watch). My latest fixation (as in starting from last night) is over Cheryl Cole’s music video for Parachute. I have it both in my laptop and in my BlackBerry! I was watching it on my laptop but it felt like something was missing and so I watched it on my BlackBerry. Then I was like, “Aaaah. OK.”. I can not explain it.

My point is, I have never been fixated by the telly. I remember not having one when I was staying on my own during university years and I do not have one now. Sometimes I find it a hassle as in when I have one, I would have to subscribe to Astro for better (not really) reception of channels and paid channels. I am fine not having all that. But I have a very nice sound system. It can play everything from a dvd, vcd, mp3, radio and even the cassette. I played my Hamlet dvd there and just listened. I imagined the scenes as I have seen the movie far too many times. Perhaps as much as I had seen The Shawshank Redemption!

So, when you come over to my “palace”, where I rule and rule from, think of it like you are on a holiday. You do not sit and watch the telly when you are on a holiday. You go out and about. You go down for a swim (yes, there is a nice swimming pool here). Do things. Have a nice holiday like time here at my “palace” and nearby and surrounding territory. It is anyway a wonderful place here.

Sunday last, I had picnic at the Lake Garden with a bunch of nice people and babies. The weather was very nice save for the lack of wind. With some cool wind, the picnic would have been perfect. Hazlina made lasagna, which was so good! Maisarah Noor made shepherds pie, which was good too. Others bought nasi lemak, bihun goreng, tuna sandwich, junk food, etc. I brought with me 2 bottles of cool mineral water and a box of high calcium vegetable biscuits LOL. We can not blame the mothers for buying and not cooking/preparing anything. They have babies. I could see then that having 1 would make you busier than others, what more if you have 2, like AL. Thank god Adam was so cool and macho, he minded his own business, with the fathers of course LOL. Arianna too sort of minded her own business, sitting around Ilya at all times. Iqbal, oh, he was the big brother with Adam gone minding his business with the dinosaurs with the fathers. Awal, he seemed like a baby with not that many demands. I suppose since he was sitting with me almost half of the time, what could he possibly do. I am the “aunty G” as the mothers put it. All I did was fan them kids (with a plastic plate) so that they do not get too hot thus becoming grumpy. So, whilst all the babies (save for Arianna) were at the “nursery” with aunty G, the mothers had their breakfast. Hazlina had her turns too, taking care of the kids. I did not mind at all as those babies/kids were just adorable. Adam too, even though he kept on “disappearing away” from the mothers-babies and aunty G’s (nursery) area. Well, he was too cool and macho to hang out with mothers, aunts and babies LOL. Just after the mothers and aunts finished with breakfast, the kids started a synchronized noise. They started a choir! They were all hungry at the same time and oh my goodness, the mothers acted really quick, it was like an action movie LOL. Irregardless of the crying, the almost fights that the babies were having with each other over everything from drumming Al’s boxy bag, a biscuit container and a dumbo, it was a fun picnic. There were talks of a next get together, perhaps the zoo or the bird park (where we foresee that the mothers would be more excited than the kids). I would not mind having those fun kids with me, and of course the mothers and the aunts too.

(L-R) Najida’s husband (I think his name is Aiman), Ed, Ilya, Arianna, Awal, Al, Hazlina, Najida, Iqbal, Ema & Omar

(Sitting in front) Gina A.R (that is me of course), Maisarah Noor & Adam

Lunch, Kenny Rogers, nice friendly people and friends. Having lunch at Kenny Rogers should be something rather ordinary, nothing extraordinary. I can not remember the last time I had anything from Kenny Rogers! The menu is “standard”. The taste is, well, the same. However, there is nothing ordinary about meeting new people and being surrounded by warmth.

My lunch today was no ordinary lunch. I had lunch with two friends, one of whom, Al,  I had known since 1998/1999; more than 10 years ago and oh my God, how time flies it does not feel like it was 10 years ago. Al brought along 2 of her colleagues. I have never met them before today but my goodness, they were really friendly. The kind of people you would just say “Oh, they are my friends!” the moment you finish your lunch LOL. One of them even showed my colleague cum friend (the other friend, not Al) and I photos of her children when we dropped by their office! It is not often I meet this kind of people. Well, not me personally.

So, there are times when the ordinary becomes anything but simply because of those around us. Roses are just flowers until they are given to us by someone special. A cake is simply a cake unless it is our birthday(cake).